Turning 30: Independence
I'll be honest and say that I haven't always had the easiest time adjusting to the impending threshold. Initially, it made me feel like I should have more accomplished. Five years ago, I would have expected that by 30 I would be married and probably have a baby. There would most likely even be a mortgage involved and I would have been thinking about what type of stroller would be better for city living. I would channel my love of bulk purchases into Diapers.com.
My life isn't like that... pretty much at all. I'm single. I have a cat, not a baby. My socks never match (and its obvious because they after often neon). But, it's so fulfilling in ways that I didn't anticipate.
Sometimes it's challenging to be thankful for being single and 30. Last week, I was completely sidelined by the worst back pain I've ever had. It was so bad that I knew if I fell over walking to work, I knew I wouldn't be able to get up. I almost had to call my sister to help me off the couch... because I accidentally fell asleep and couldn't get up. I don't take pride in knowing that I can take care of myself when I'm sidelined with something. It actually makes me anxious about ever being sick.
But, sometimes it takes people a long time to meet their partner and it's good to know that until that happens I can take care of myself. I like knowing that I can keep myself occupied and entertained on a rainy weekend in the city just as much as sunny stretch of days. While it might lead to a mess, I like attempting to fix or make something myself first.
It almost makes me wonder what life would have been like if the 25 year old vision had become a reality.
I haven't been writing much this month in part because I haven't really been cooking and I've been snuggling my parents new puppy. But as I head into Saturday, I'm going to push myself to write more often this week. I'm not sure what I'm going to write about but I think it'll be a balance of the things I've learned and the things I'm looking to learn.
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